Suicide among adolescents

Suicide is taking our own lives before our prescribed death

We decide to take our lives instead of living until death calls upon us

So, for Muslim beliefs, this is a terrible state because suicide is not permissible. It is giving ourselves to the plot of shaytan, subhan Allah. May Allah have mercy upon us and protect us against the plot and waswas of shaytan

It is important to consider how many people are distressed, desperate and hopeless. They can not find a solution to their problems. It is as if they are living in darkness and there are no hands to take them away from their heavy troubles

Many parents [not all, Alhamdulillah] do not converse with their kids. They do not have time or do not care to know what is happening in the lives of their daughters and sons. What seems more interesting nowadays is to buy gadgets that they think may replace valuable moments or eating together at a fast food where everyone is looking at their mobiles.

As you see, human beings are created with emotions. they are full of emotions and if they do not learn how to release these emotions, they become fragile. And many medias such as bollywood films which show that LOVE is the greatest religion, may create many confusions in the child. Love is not a religion and loving should not be idealized to the point that  kids may decide to kill themselves in the name of love.

Parents should train their children and at the same time, should not pressure them or threaten them with all kinds of things so that their fragile mind cannot support anymore and they decide to kill themselves

Yes, there are cases of Muslims who kill themselves because our societies refuse to listen or we stand as judges instead of supporters. People like to have children for decorations but when you walk on the roads, you can see how many people illtreat their babies and young kids. I have once seen a man, like an angry monster slapping his two-three year old son [who just started walking] who was walking around in a restaurant instead of following his parents. The angry bulldog came and slapped the little kid in the head and he fell face down crying but the monster was not at all ashamed!!! Imagine, he did not show any sign of pity towards his own son who was crying. Instead he showed more anger and the wife who was several steps away, rushed in.  she was ashamed by this public scene – things that she is used to at home [may be]. Everybody was watching. so, she said: “You are a savage!” Now imagine how he behaves everyday with his kid at home, imagine how this little boy is going to pass his childhood and adolescent next to such a man!!!!

They were not Muslims but anger, violence has no religion. It happens in the mind and heart of the individual. Anyone can be loving. anyone can be violent.

I saw another situation where a girl of ten, eleven was walking with her parents and she asked for something. the mother just hit her in the face and the girl shyly and powerless, looked down. But you could feel how disappointed she felt, how uncomfortable …but there are many monsters like this who PRETEND they like children but in reality they hate others and they do not know how to love their own children and the society is looking at such things without a word. Yes, without a word because if you try to intervene, they will slap you, insult you and create huge problems for you. You can only make dua for them and pray that they read something and change for the best

Now imagine, do you think that these children will establish good rapport with their parents once they grow old? This is another subject that we will treat separately

Coming to the point of suicide, there are young kids who are desperate in love, where parents decide to refuse their fiance simply because they have dark colored skin, yes, we still have such cases!! Or because the girl has a degree and the boy has  a higher certificate, or the boys is earning a little less than the girl. These are cases of ignorance where parents do not care for the heart of their own kids. It is a shame that Muslims are still forcing their kids to marry old and rich guys. Forcing in Islam is a sin but they do not fear Allah at all. They act as gods and goddesses in their own houses

Children often do not have islamic knowledge because their parents themselves are ignorant and focus on secular knowledge and when they are in trouble, they cannot find any solution

Why do you have to force your daughter to marry someone of your choice? Why do you have to choose a girl for your son? Who gave you that right to decide and impose upon them to the point of losing them forever? Many children are abused by their parents. Abuse is a terrible thing because it gets over your emotion and destroy your life. Some people even take it on religion, saying it is your duty to listen to your mum or dad. Yes, there is a limit to everything. When a child reaches a certain age and feel comfortable to marry, you as a parent, you cannot forbid your child to marry. You can advise. You can discuss but you cannot impose especially if you have no point in disagreeing. don’t build high expectations that reflect only your dreams and not the dreams of your children.

Think how you would feel if you were in his/her position.

Stop abuse. Stop love abuse. stop power abuse. stop parental abuse

 

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The importance of seeking advice

Often as human  beings we are confronted with many decisions. We don’t always have the right answer. So, instead of taking the wrong decision, we ask people in our circle to help us out.

that’s good. What we need to think about is, whether those people are capable for a good decision. Think about it

The Qur’an addresses Muslims by telling them to consult each other. Consultation is of utmost importance and it is explained in chapter 42:38 [Ash Shuarah]

After having talked to your circle of friends and families, remember that istigharah is most important than anything else.

Jabir (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) used to teach us the Istikharah (seeking guidance from Allah) in all matters as he would teach us a Surah of the Qur’an. He used to say:
“When one of you contemplates entering upon an enterprise, let him perform two Rak`ah of optional prayer other than Fard prayers and then supplicate:

اللّهُـمَّ إِنِّـي أَسْتَخيـرُكَ بِعِاْـمِك، وَأسْتَقْـدِرُكَ بِقُـدْرَتِـك، وَأَسْـألُـكَ مِنْ فَضْـلِكَ العَظـيم، فَإِنَّـكَ تَقْـدِرُ وَلا أَقْـدِر، وَتَـعْلَـمُ وَلا أَعْلَـم، وَأَنْـتَ عَلاّمُ الغُـيوب، اللّهُـمَّ إِنْ كُنْـتَ تَعْـلَمُ أَنَّ هـذا الأمْـرَ- وَيُسَـمِّي حاجَتَـه – خَـيْرٌ لي في دينـي وَمَعـاشي وَعاقِـبَةِ أَمْـري، فَاقْـدُرْهُ لي وَيَسِّـرْهُ لي ثـمَّ بارِكْ لي فيـه، وَإِنْ كُنْـتَ تَعْـلَمُ أَنَّ هـذا الأمْـرَ شَـرٌ لي في دينـي وَمَعـاشي وَعاقِـبَةِ أَمْـري، فَاصْرِفَهُ عَنِّي وَاصْرِفْنِي عَنْهُ وَاقْـدُرْ لي الخَـيْرَ حَيْـثُ كانَ ثُـمَّ أَرْضِـني بِـه

(O Allah, I consult You through Your Knowledge, and I seek strength through Your Power, and ask of Your Great Bounty; for You are Capable whereas I am not and, You know and I do not, and You are the Knower of hidden things. O Allah, if You know that this matter (and name it) is good for me in respect of my Deen, my livelihood and the consequences of my affairs, (or he said), the sooner or the later of my affairs then ordain it for me, make it easy for me, and bless it for me. But if You know this matter (and name it) to be bad for my Deen, my livelihood or the consequences of my affairs, (or he said) the sooner or the later of my affairs then turn it away from me, and turn me away from it, and grant me power to do good whatever it may be, and cause me to be contented with it). And let the supplicant specify the object.”

[Bukhari & Muslim]
Tag: al istighara, what islam says about decision making, consultation in islam

Mauritius: where to get halal food?

Frequently asked questions  Image result for halal

Many readers have in-boxed me concerning issues of halal

1- Is Mauritius a Muslim country?

No, Muslims are a minority

2. Do we have halal food everywhere in Mauritius?

No, we do not have halal food everywhere

3. Is halal food easy available?

Yes, halal food is easily available in some regions especially in Port-Louis and Phoenix. Alhamdulillah, there are more availabilities in Beau-Bassin, Rose-Hill, Quatre-Bornes and Curepipe 

4. Do all restaurants provide halal food?

No, only Muslim restaurants are 100 % halal. In some other restaurants, they may have a halal certificate. The certificate is annexed openly [those who pretend they have a certificate kept in the drawer or in a room should not be trusted]

Those who write “Halal food – no pork, no alcohol” BUT do not have a certificate may not be halal

5. Can we eat at hotels?

Yes and NO

It is our duty as Muslims to reject any kind of subterfuge – when we are talking about halal food, we mean there is no cross-contamination of halal and haram. Well, in many hotels, the workers have not learnt about halal and haram. They do not know the word ‘halal’. and if you ask them about ‘Muslim food’ they simply show you vegetarian food which are often placed next to pork. Often you see cheese placed next to jam. This is not only confusing but an INSULT !!!

Once you book for a hotel, you have to make a clear request. Hotel managers have to respect you as a client. so, do not be shy to come with your request. Do not accept omelet that are cooked in the same recipient where jam is cooked. You can see this practice in many hotels [worldwide, not only in Mauritius].

6. Are we allowed to eat at the polytheists?

Have a look at surah Maaidah [chapter 5] Allah has given us the PERMISSION to eat at the people of the Book. So, the polytheists do not form part of it. The best thing is to eat food cooked by yourself where you start in the name of Allah and you make dua that this food bring blessing to the whole family. Eating blessed food is important for our health but when you are travelling, it is not easy, so you should opt for a professional hotel who cares about healthy and clean food as well as halal food.

7. How to cook our own food when we are travelling?

You must choose apartments where they provide for kitchen. fresh halal meat and chicken are easily available. Most of our butchers are Muslims

8. Are vegetarians food halal for Muslims?

YES and NO

Vegetarian food is halal when it contains the right ingredients

Vegetarian food may contain alcohol such as wine vinegar in salad sauce. wine is used in many dishes, in dessert such as pancake, crepe etc. In fruit salad. fruit cocktail is famous in Mauritius and they often contain beer to preserve the fruit.

Some communities eat blood curry so you should beware of this.

  • Blood and blood by-products
  • Wine, beer, rhum, liquor
  • Animal
  • Human hair or animal hair
  • Foods contaminated with any of the above products
  • GELATINE  is an odourless, tasteless, protein substance like glue or jelly, obtained by boiling the bones, hoofs, and other waste parts of animals. [some gelatine are veg such as agar agar]
  • COCHINEAL/CARMINE – E120, E122    A red dyestuff consisting of dried bodies of female cochineal insects. [red color in various food]

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